What it is to me.

I'd like to tell you first of all, what the lifestyle represents to me does not mean that is what it should be to you. There is no bible on BDSM. It is take what you want and leave what you want. To become a well rounded individual. It means many different things to many people. It just depends on whom you are talking to at the time. To me there are 3 very different aspects. Those of which you can join together to make your own definitions and your own styles. D/s-Dominance submission. Mental control. Handing ones power over to another. This to me is the ultimate sacrifice and the most rewarding. BD- Bondage discipline. Want to be tied to the bed and punished when you do something wrong? SM-sado-masochism. Severe pain. Punishment. Surely you will always feel the sting of the whip against your body. Some people are deeply into this. For me I take a little from all. To become who I am today. My likes differ a great deal from others. That's fine because that is what makes me unique. I was just lucky enough to find a Dom into the same things I am into. Safety and trust are also paramount if you live the lifestyle. Trust and communication are key. How can you hand over your body to someone who lies to you? How do you know he or she is not lying to you right now? Just to tie you and whip you. Never enter a scene without knowing the person well. Without having some trust. Never meet a new person off the internet or anywhere without having a safe call. A safe call is merely a phone call to a good friend who knows exactly where you are. Who you are meeting? Any and all information about whom you are meeting. If you don't call in at your specified times the friend goes straight to the police. Files a missing person report. If a Dominant does not want to give you information. Or they downplay the importance. Then they are not for you anyway. They do not care about your safety from the start. Why would they care later on? A good place to meet a new person is a munch. We have them all over. It’s nothing more than meeting a group of friends in a restaurant for lunch. Public place. Many people around in case you need help.